We all know the score: once you’ve been in a relationship for a while, especially once you have children, finding time for sex can be difficult. Consequently, love making can become routine. Saturday night is the only evening you get to spend alone, so it’s an unwritten rule that that’s the scheduled sex night. You’ve both had a stressful week and you‘re exhausted, so you climb into bed and go through the motions.
I’m not speaking from personal experience, you understand, it’s just an illustration. OK, there might be a little bit of personal experience. Sounds familiar, though, right?
Routine Can be Good
The first thing I’d like to impress upon you is that ‘routine sex’ isn’t bad sex, it doesn’t even have to be unexciting sex. For men, at least, knowing when they’re going to “get some” can be an extremely positive thing. Certainly, from a male perspective, knowing when they’re going to have sex is far better than wondering if they’ll ever have sex again!
For us women, however, ‘routine’ may not seem like such an exciting prospect. This is because, for us, sex is all about romance and we often crave a little spontaneity. Well, the great news is that spontaneity and romance are not precluded from routine sex. It just requires a little effort.
Ways to Spice up Routine Sex
Bear in mind, just because you know when you’re going to be having sex, it doesn’t mean you know how you’re going to be having sex. And, in actual fact, having an ‘appointment’ for making love can be a great thing, because it gives us girls plenty of time to get in the mood for sex. If you know you’re going to be having sex on a particular evening, you can spend the whole day working yourself up to a state of arousal, by flirting with your lover, pampering yourself, fantasizing etc., etc.
However, if you’d like to add a little extra something to those routine sexual encounters, there are many, many ways to achieve that. Here are just a few suggestions:
Don’t skip on the foreplay: Often when you engage in routine sex, the foreplay is largely forgotten. Don’t assume that your lover wants to get right down to the main event, because most men appreciate the arousing benefits of foreplay just as much as we do. Just make sure you’re making it as pleasurable for him as you’d like him to make it for you.
Have fun: Remember, sex should be a fun way for you and your lover to reconnect and bond. Find some sexy games that you can play, laugh with each other and enjoy your partner’s company. Sex isn’t always a serious business!
Share your fantasies: During foreplay or intercourse, talk to your lover about your most exciting fantasies (preferably ones that features him). In turn, ask him to tell you about one of his fantasies (hopefully, he’ll pick one that features you).
Of course, there are an endless number of ways to make your sex life more exciting, but those mentioned above are simple things that can be comfortably done by almost every couple.